I'm cuddled next to Andrew while he is still sleeping, the smell and sound of rain is coming through our bedroom sliding doors that are framed with Christmas lights, & Sleeping at Last is playing quietly off my phone.
These little moments are some of my favorites. Moments I am so grateful for and I wish would last for hours. Soothing to both my mind and heart, especially after the craziness of the last few months.
Today marks month three of being in Ventura. It has been a slow process of getting used to the area, the people, and climate.
We live less then a few streets away from great restaurants, grocery stores, and entertainment. We are so spoiled that thinking of having to hop on the freeway for anything seems less then favorable. The beach is less then 10 minutes away and the coveted Santa Barbara only 30 minutes (without traffic of course). My work is 6 minutes away, and $10 of gas gets me to and from work for a week, with a few other excursions tossed in.
The people so far have been rather interesting. Not as intimidating as those back home, but also a little less kind. A lot of people out here come from old money, so it feels like at moments they are slightly less forgiving or welcoming of those who make their coffee wrong or get in their way at the grocery store. Alas, we have also met some amazing people from our community group. I am so grateful to already be a part of a group whose hearts are genuine, seeking the Lord, and see the power and importance of prayer.
While others back home are dealing with temperatures in the high 90's, we barely ever hit 75. I miss the heat at moments, but am grateful for mornings where the clouds and weather remind me so fondly of fall.
I'd like to be able to say that I have taken this time of change very well. But I haven't. In ways, I have found myself kicking and screaming about certain areas of change. I have, somewhat embarrassingly, let the stresses consume me so much that it affected both my attitude and health.
But things are improving. I am remembering to let go of areas I am trying to control so tightly, and see how God provides instead. I am learning to be more intentional with time, whether that is going for a walk, loving on my little plants on the patio, or investing time into cooking blogs to make meals a little more exciting. I just learned, that adding fresh basil to a chicken salad really does a wonder! I am realizing, it is totally ok to just sit and watch tv for hours to relax, or go to the beach and watch the waves crash until the sun sets.
I really struggle with having so much down time lately. I feel like I am not being productive enough and if I allow myself, I end up sitting for hours over-thinking things which just really doesn't help at all. But I think, God is really trying to show me to slow down, spend time with Him, and be ok just being. And so, I am going to do just that today with my husband, until we go into work later this evening.